faith.

it feels like it has been such a long time since i've written on this blog. i don't know if anyone even reads it anymore, but alas here i am writing on it.
it's hard to believe february of 2012 is already half way over. time has flown by, and at the same time it feels like it's dragging. i've been in idaho since january which feels like an eternity.
more and more recently i've been realizing different things i'm grateful for. it's an interesting and humbling experience going through trials and struggles. you don't want them, but you need them. realizing that is hard. but it is necessary.
i've recently heard a quote that is constantly going through my head through it all.

Elder Neil L. Andersen said, “Faith is not only a feeling; it is a decision.”


i feel like that small quote has changed my life. i think of it when i'm struggling, crying, needing a reason to get out of bed to get ready for church when i'm sick. i never realized it was a decision. you decide to do something because you've chosen faith. you've chosen to move on. you've chosen to live your life in faith.
the choice isn't necessarily easy. but you reap what you sow. you don't get something from nothing.
you decide to have faith in Christ amongst the battles with adversary. because whether you choose to believe it or not, there is a battle. you cannot play on the sidelines and wait for it to be over because without paying attention, you may end up cheering for the wrong side. because reality is, satan has an influence on your life. you need to make sure Christ's influence is stronger.

i believe in Christ. so come what may. and love it.

one of my newest favorite things.

summer storms in rexburg, idaho.
we talk about how beautiful california is... which it undoubtedly is. but there is something about it here that makes you want to just sit outside and look up to the sky. when the lightning shoots across the sky and the thunder rolls, the words of how great thou art run through my head. i don't want to go to bed with earth as beautiful it is. it was created by Him. looking outside, i remember Him.
my God, how great Thou art.

just an update

my birthday is in a week.
my roommate connie is engaged!! i love her&bryan sooo much!!
i got a letter from hunter.
i got a 95 on my math exam. i got a 95 on my essay in advanced english and critical thinking.
my english teacher says i'm not as stupid as i appear&i'm delightful. yay!
and here are some of my basic construction drawings from my art class.
week one

week dos

week three

i'm excited for real drawings haha.

spring semest: you're kicking my butt.

this semest is killing me i tell you! it's only been a week but it feels like years! i'm SO excited for july when it'll be done&i can go back to california! haha
i love my friends. the other day we dyed easter eggs. mine came out quite splendid. then we went to the park where we were attacked by people in masks! rude. &scary. good thing the boys were there. i swear they're not scared of anything (unless i prank call them as sarah stone;)
well i have to get back to the hdub.
peace blog world.

winter semest: DONE.

i cannot believe the semester is over. sometimes i'm like "praise the lord, it's done." other times i'm like "well dang, that went by quick." i guess it's safe to say i'm not sure how i feel about it being done.
don't get me wrong, i'm totally stoked. the end of the semest means LESS SNOW. however, slightly debatable. today i was busy moving from 319 to 315. (doesn't sound bad, but considering 315 is in a dif building, it becomes a nuisance going down three floors with my boxes, bins, and garbage bags full of ish, only to go up three floors with all of that, to go back down, up, down, up... you get the picture.) anyway, it snowed. the biggest snow flakes i've seen in my life, and that's saying a lot considering i've spent the last three months in iceburg. but, i surprisingly liked it. the snow flakes were fun to catch:)
i forgot where i was going with this.
this semester was such an interesting one. i've learned a lot, to say the very least. it has taught me about what i want, who i am, and what i can become. i've met some amazing people. i had amazing teachers, like i LOVED my teachers. they dealt with me and liked me, so how can i complain. oh&btdubs, i got all a's &a-minuses. i think. cross your fingers for me.
plus i love my roommates.


i never thought i'd say this, but i think this is the place i'm supposed to be. rexburg, idaho. i know. craze.
i'm learning to trust the Lord. i'm learning to love the gospel. i'm seeing how blessed i am. life is such a blessing, how can i complain? i don't know where i'll be in a year from now, but i just want to be happy. &i think i'm getting there.

oh rexburg.

you are cold. you make my face hurt because i think i freeze a little each time i step outside. your icy cement makes me fall. a lot.
but i sorta like this wretched town.

the sf giants just made me the happiest girl alive!!

victory.

i'm going to miss seeing aubrey's hot self, pat's cute butt, cain, timmy, andres, codyyyyy, hot freddy, uuuu-ribe, edykins rentaria, madison bumgarner's bum, BUSTER, ishikawa, johnny boy, eli, nate schierholtz (the man i'm gonna marry). pablo, mike, romo, mota mota, santi, affeldt's cute hair,of course brian wilson (the other man i'm gonna marry), barry, javi, ramirez, aaron... &everybody.

the giants are going to the world series!!!

&that is how it's done.



i love these hot men. just a btw.

above all else.

i'm sure to anyone reading this, especially my lovely mormons, are wondering when i will finally write what's most important in my life. lets just say, i've been waiting for the end of the month.
lets pretend it's still august.
above all, i am most grateful for my Heavenly Father, my Savior Jesus Christ, and his gospel.
i don't know if i can ever truly realize how blessed i am. but i have the slightest clue that i am.
in the crazy world we live in today, it is so easy to be distracted. whether it be big or small, we can let it take a toll. throughout life, there is some things that never have, or ever will, deceive me, fight with me, or hurt my feelings.
i am so grateful to know that i have a loving Heavenly Father. He has given me everything. all that is good comes from Him. everything i could ever be grateful for, He is the core of it all. His Son, Jesus Christ, gave His life for me. for all of us. what greater gift is there? nothing can compare.
i am so grateful to know that the fulness of the gospel has been restored. there is no question in my mind that The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints is God's church. i have read the Book of Mormon, i have prayed. if anyone lacks wisdom of this, read it. then pray with real intent, with nothing wavering.
i am grateful to know that i am a Daughter of a King, a Child of God. we all are. i would feel very alone in the universe if i didn't know this.
i cannot look into the stars, the galaxies, and not feel the celestial glory that come from them.
i love my Heavenly Father. i love my Savior.



&i love you:)

ps, here's the vid of josh attacking me while he's dressed like a monkey from monday night. you can't really see, but hearing is plenty embarrassing enough.

oh, hello gratitude. i haven't forgotten about you.

oh summer two thousand and ten. you have been delightful.
crazy, scary, funny, precious.
like seriously, it's been a good few months.
whether is be going to the temple; going to "the spot;" the beach; camping with the fam; camping with friends; learning more about the gospel; getting attacked by josh in a monkey suit; spending the night doing nothing with megan, tim, and connie; laughing like a crazy; midnight runs with monica and johnny; talking on the phone with brent until the early hours in the morning; rafting; or writing to hunter about it all- it has been memorable.
i am grateful for all these experiences. i have learned a lot this summer, things i'll never forget. my family means everything to me. my friends have become my family.
if it weren't for the people in my life, this summer would have been basically nothing.
i'm grateful for knowledge. i'm grateful for the knowledge that you're never alone. the Lord is mindful of all of us. He knows our struggles. He will not lead us comfortless.
sometimes i forget this.
sometimes all i need to do is remember.

just another day

this week sucks.
but i'm grateful for my little sister.
she is so sweet, and such an example to me.

just some thinking

so today i honestly don't know what's going on in my crazy, fast paced head. so much.
i wish i could get in like a time machine. things would be so different. i look at where i am today and where i was a year ago. i was getting ready to start cosmetology school. i was so excited, thinking about it gets me excited all over again. i had discovered something i loved. everything about it, it was all so.. me. if i hadn't come home, i'd be graduating in two months. that's a face punch right there. i look back and wonder what it would have been like to stay.
but wondering does us really nothing huh? wishing time machines exist do nothing. if i stayed, i would have ignored the inspiration i had received. who knows what that alone could've done to change the course of my future. it's sad and pathetic t look back and wish i had never gotten that feeling from the Spirit to go home.. deep down inside, ignoring my thoughts, i did the right thing.. for whichever reason that may be.
i've been thinking about friends. along with people who may not be my friends at all. i'm tired of caring for people who may not care back. sure, in a sense they do. but is it enough? because if there is anything i've learned, i've learned i do not want to settle. i want it all, or nothing at all.
i'm grateful for realness. i know that sounds strange.. but i'm not sure how to say in another word.
k. thought of it. i'm grateful for real things.
i like real things, like an "i love you." &country singing cowboys. i'm grateful for what matters. people who honestly care about other people, people who would do anything because they know it's right, not out of obligation. i'm grateful for truth. i'm grateful fot the blessing of life, a brand new day. i'm grateful for the people i've been blessed to know.
i'm not grateful for douche bags.

i am so ready to move on with life. i'm so ready to stop looking back. live life with no regrets, no compromises. i'm ready to live true to the faith that i cherish.
everything else.. it's so yesterday.

a little late, eh?

The past few weeks have been pretty crazy, haven’t had too much time to work on el blogo. But regardless, I’ve taken time of my day to think of the different things I am grateful for.
I am grateful for the simplicity of honesty. I never really thought much of it. I’ve always considered myself an honest person, at times a little too honest. But I’ve come to realize it’s more than just saying ,“Yeah, I tell the truth.” It’s also about being honest with myself. I struggle with this.
I tell myself I’m not good enough. I tell myself I’m not pretty enough. I tell myself I’m not smart enough. These are all lies I’ve allowed myself to believe. Who’s to say that we’re not good enough? The world would be a bit easier if we were more honest.
Last weekend I went camping and rafting with my friends. I was grateful for this experience. I slept under the stars for the first time! I went rafting for the first time! It was so much fun. I love my friends.
I’m grateful for the temple. Tonight I went to the Oakland temple, lied down on a bench, and just looked up at the sky. It was so beautiful. There was so much on my mind, and unfortunately I wasn’t feeling all to that good. But I can’t say I didn’t feel one thing that so many of us forget: We are children of God, a God who loves us despite ourselves. God is real. Temples are a little piece of heaven. I cannot wait until the day I will be able to enter into it with my future husband who not only loves me, but first loves the Lord.
Speaking of heaven, I’m grateful for warm showers.
This Sunday I’m giving a talk on church. Wish me luck. I’ll be needing it.
The Lord is good to me, and so I thank the Lord.

twelve

i'm grateful for the opportunity of growth.

days nine through eleven.

eek. late much?
(&apparently quoting hannah montana doesn't count? blast.)
but i am grateful for the little things. and just to name a few:
the color yellow. mango orange nail polish. daisies. waking up in the morning to realize you can keep sleeping. hugs. nail polish in general. crunchy leaves. my brain. the smell of rain. talking to yourself when no one is around. long showers. singing as loud as i possibly can. spending time with my family. laughing. laughing yourself to tears. laughing so much it hurts. laughing until you're about to pee your pants. makeup. hair products. herbal essences body envy hairspray. my hair. flushable toilets. water. the color orange. mascara. holding hands. paper. music. showers. sandals. joe don. bananas. grapes. trees. stars. anyone who has ever made me laugh. a bed to sleep in. mountains. clouds. eyebrows. colored pencils. screaming, yelling. writing. art. poetry. looking out your window and seeing the moon. the realization you are not alone in the world. guilty pleasures. vanilla pudding. straws. m&ms. comfy pillows. mouthwash. floss. long lasting gum. birds. oceans. sand under my feet. cute boys. cats. baseball fields. staying up late. sleeping in. sunlight. technology. cranberry juice. holidays. weekends. parties. being able to dance like a complete idiot.
&once you start looking at the little things, suddenly they don't seem so little.

ocho dia?

i am grateful for life.
life's what you make it, so lets make it rock.

an hour late on day seven

but i am very grateful for the people in my life. i have been blessed with knowing the people i call my friends.

day six; writing on this everyday is harder then i thought it would be.

sorry to everyone who's getting my blog updates. eek.
anyhow, i am grateful for the opportunity to be happy.
happiness is not just given to us. without opposition, we wouldn't even know what it is.
i believe we are all on a road to happiness. i have faith that i will get there.

day five of thirty-one. a very touching video.

i am grateful for forgiveness.
my best fried sierra blogged this video about forgiveness. it made me cry. i suggest everyone watch it.

on the fourth day of gratitude

I am grateful for my family. I love them so gosh darn much, even when they drive me so gosh darn crazy. I have been truly blessed to be born into the family I have.
My dad is my hero. As long as I can remember, he's either been a Bishop, in the Stake Presidency, or High Council at church. He's dedicated his life to the gospel, and I respect that. My dad has suffered through cancer twice, but never once have I heard him complain. Through all my life, I've never heard him complain once. My dad has a great sense of humor. My dad would always give me the same advice whenever I left the house: "Alyssa, don't be stupid." (sadly, i don't think this advice is part of his sense of humor, but straight up advice.) I'm so happy to be "his girl." I have always felt close to him, and know he will always love me, even when I am stupid.
My mom is my example. My mom has been through so much in her life, she has come such a long way. It breaks my heart to think of the life she had growing up in an alcoholic and abusive home. I see the way she's raised us kids, providing us a home of love and care. She tries to be the best mom possible, I don't think she realizes she already is the best mom I could have asked for. Despite all of our arguments, at the end of the day she is usually right. She is constantly giving; serving is her favorite thing to do. I am always able to talk to my mom about anything, even when I do actually mess up. She has set an example of what a mother is, as well as a wife.
I have six brothers and sisters, it would take too long to write about them individually. But my siblings are my best friends. They have set an example for me, even my younger sister. Most of my favorite memories and best laughs involve all of them. I am so thankful to be their sister.
Like Nephi, I have been born of goodly parents who love the Lord. They created the people I call my family. I am truly honored to be a member of this heritage. I know families can be together forever. I look forward to this promise. Someday I will have a family of my own, I will teach them the things my own has taught me.
I am eternally grateful.