thirty-one days of gratitude.

twenty minutes until it will be the second day of august. usually i really wouldn't care, but i've got a plan, and these next twenty minutes will be important.
i am challenging myself to think of something i am grateful for everyday this month. yes, i will be recording it all on this blog. talk about a lot of blog updates. i'm mostly writing it on here for my own knowledge, and to make sure i actually remember to do it. these things i write daily will be in no particular order, it will just be something maybe i've noticed that day, or basically whatev. i have no idea what things i will think of for the next month, my mind works in mysterious ways. but i am curious to see what comes of it. hopefully something. hopefully i will learn from this. &to be honest, i think i can.
lets kick this gratitude into gear.

day one.
today i am grateful for people being willing to help. today is sunday. i went to church as normal, i went to my class as normal. but today was harder, the kids were crazy. each individual was well, naturally their own individual. they all wanted to do their own thing. one of the boys i worked with was struggling today, he didn't want to stay in the primary room for opening exercises (singing and sharing time). so instead, he'd rather run around the church for that hour.
to be honest, i have no idea what was wrong with me today. maybe i was just feeling sad, helpless, and basically unable to help this boy at. so, after an hour of trying to carry him, trying to run with him, and just plain trying to keep him occupied, i was tired. i was so stressed out. i am very weak. i started crying. i felt like i failed this poor boy who needs my help because of the situation he has, and i felt like i was inadequate of my calling.
i hate crying, i hate showing people just how vulnerable i am. i wasn't full on crying, but enough to where i put myself out there.
than one of the sisters at church saw me trying to carry this sweet five year old, who i swear is practically as tall as me, and she offered to help. she used to be the teacher of the class i now teach, and she sacrificed her time to help my crying baby self. she helped with offering me advice, telling me different ways she was able to help this boy, and very lovingly, non-judgmentally helped me. (&i was able to go to the bathroom, dry my eyes and convince myself everything would be okay. i don't think she knows how much she helped me, but i was grateful for her willingness to help.
today i am grateful for people who sacrifice their time to serve others. anyone can do it. anyone can help another by simply just being willing to serve.
i am grateful.